Grampy Lash

Last night we watched an episode of NOVA on PBS that focused on the study of deep sea creatures living in the depths of the South Pacific ocean. These animals had, over millions of years, adapted to their lightless environment by developing their own built in light emitting mechanisms know as bioluminescence and biofluoresence. They used their lights primarily to attract food sources and to protect themselves from their own predators. The variety of colors they produced were magnificent, the way they used them to deceive their predators was brilliant. The scientists are using their research information to attempt a deeper probe of the human brain.
Eventually the presentation moved above ground to briefly discuss some creatures who also have intrinsic light emitters; one in particular known to all as the lightning bug. Most people, like me, believe that they just fly around from dusk to dawn, randomly flashing their little lights to entertain us and serve to be captured by children at the risk of being imprisoned in glass jars.The lightning bug however, doesn’t care about humans, and is not as concerned about feeding or protecting himself as he is about finding a hot date for the night.

These savvy creatures not only produce and willfully control their flashes; they have developed their own code, something akin to morse code I suppose, to
communicate their nocturnal lusts amongst themselves. The male varies the duration and cadence of light emissions and the females respond with theirs. Not every response is positive, but eventually the male perseverance pays off. He gets lucky and soon together they light the night. This got me to thinking.

Later in the evening when my wife and I had retired for the night, and the room was dark, I grabbed my little Mighty Bright reading light and experimented with a few blinking combinations of my own.

Blink,blink,blink… blink,blink!

No response.

Blink,blink,blink,blink… blink, blink… blink!

Nothing.

In spite of sleep creeping up on me, I tried one more pleading signal: blink… blink…
blink… blink,blink!

A response! A rapid staccato string of flashes that I was unable to translate.

Just to confirm the communication, I resent my last message.

The second response was slower and much easier to understand.

Bill,blink,blink. Blink,blink,blink… blink… blink… blink.

This turned out to be lightning bug-speak for, “Not tonight. I have a headache… you… old… coot.”

Unlike the perseverant lightning bug, my only option was to put away my Mighty Bright light, close my eyes, and simply go to sleep –  with the satisfaction of knowing that at least my little bioluminescent light flasher still works.

February 6, 2016